Flashback Friday - It's been three years!

It makes my breath stop when I realize it has been THREE YEARS since I started this blog. THREE YEARS since I finally saw those two very light lines that informed me that, YES, I was, indeed pregnant. I remember it like it was yesterday.

When you are trying to conceive, it makes you very, very in tune to your body. You notice every single pull, every twitch, every cramp, and then google the crap out of it. You take your temperature every morning of every cycle day, look at your graph, and then analyze the crap out of it as well. (You didn't know you could do that? Well, you can!) You take drugs (the legal kind), you become buddies with the ladies that work in your fertility center. You fight with your husband constantly about all this. And then you get a negative test, and you do it all over again. And again. And again.

I felt implantation (or what I had hoped was implantation - it was of course). I remember where and when it happened. (I took great notes through all this as well). A few days after that I took a test. Jake was already at work. It was faint - REALLY faint. I called my RE (Thats a Reproductive Endocrinologist) They did blood work. My beta was a 40. Pretty good for only 11DPO (days past ovulation, I was a pee-on-a-stick addict). I thought I might surprise Jake is one of those super cute ways you see on Pinterest. However, when he picked me up to go hit golf balls (for a fleeting moment I was going to pick the sport back up) I just blurted it out. He wasn't happy, or sad, he was just "just". I think he probably thought it would never happened, so he never got his hopes up. So say I was elated, was an understatement.

I was one of the lucky ones. It finally worked for me after 2.5 years of trying. I knew God had a plan in there somewhere, I just didn't realize it would be in the form of a little girl named Jules and a little boy named Josh. Twins!

Thank you all for reading along on this fantastic journey with us. What a ride it has been!

What you can't see this line? You must not have "super-sonic-can-see-the-faintest-of-lines" eyes.

Jules!

Josh

34 weeks.

28 weeks

3 days old

one month

four months

one year

18 months

2 years

Nashville flooding

This past weekend my beautiful city flooded. Many landmarks were under water: Opryland Hotel, Grand Ole Opry, Schemerhorn Symphony, the Country Music Hall of Fame, LP Field (where the TN Titans play), and the Bridgestone Arena. It is very sad and very surreal. Thankfully, my family is dry and safe. Our old neighborhood where we used to live was not so lucky. All of the homes in that subdivision were underwater. Its crazy! I could not imagine what I would have done with two infants, two cats, a husband and nothing else. Yes, I know its all just stuff. But with babies, its important stuff. Nowhere to sleep, nothing to wear, no diapers, etc etc etc. I could not imagine. These poor poor people. I really wish I could volunteer to do something, but what two babies and working, how can I? I can donate money, and of course that is needed, but I wish I could do more. Maybe I can find someone to sit with them this weekend. I hate feeling helpless...Anyway, I wanted to share with you all how awful it really is. Again, sometimes I feel so blessed!! My babies will always remember that on the year they were born Nashville experienced something for the record books!

In other news...

I have lost 32 pounds since January 8th.

I am now only 14 pounds away from my pre-pregnancy weight.

WOOHOO!!!!

BEST. DIET. EVER.

PUPPPS

Did you guys think this would be a post about doggies?? Ha! I wish...

Nope, it turns out all the itching and scratching I have been doing is not a result of stretching, winter skin. Nope, apparently I have PUPPPS (Pruritic urticarial papules and plaques of pregnancy). It is very common in first pregnancies and usually occurs in the third trimester at 35 weeks (or earlier with twins). They also think sometimes it develops due to the male DNA. So, its usually women who are delivering a boy during their first pregnancy, which I am. (thanks boy) There is no cure for it except delivery - NICE! And some pictures I have googled are really gross looking. I don't even look like I have any type of rash. I do have some stretchmarks, but you really can't see any rash unless you look really really close.

It is very, very itchy and at times I want to claw the babies out. But, they did tell me about some lotion that is helping a bit. If it doesn't get any better then they will send my to my dermatologist for a steroid shot.

But, I guess I will survive it. If this is the worst that will happen, I'm ok with it :)

Emergency! Emergency!

THE FIRST SIGNS OF STRETCH MARKS HAVE APPEARED!! AAAACK!!!!

Thats all.

Misc. Updates

There are a few updates this week, but I didn't really want to break them all into separate posts. So here goes:

We did it. We went and visited our very first daycare. And it wasn't so bad. Pretty good actually. We are trying to stay in the Green Hills area, as that is where Jake works. A new house might be on the horizon. Not soon, but sometime. And we would like to stick on one spot because we have no idea where we might be. So, since Jake works in Green Hills, we thought that would be a good first step. We went to Calvary Methodist. It came highly recommended for a co-worker of Jake's. And I think I really like the church-aspect of it. It just sounds safer (although, what do I have to compare it to, LOL? I have only been to this one)

They accept kids at 6 weeks and go up to age 5. You would think this is pretty standard, but no! SO MANY of them are very specific about what ages they will allow, and its hard to find places that accept newborns. Another reason I liked this daycare is that the standard hours are from 9-2:30 and that is a set price. If you want, you can pay extra for beforecare from 7:30-9, or aftercare from 2:30-5:30. AND, this is flexible, so you can choose which days of the week you want to do that. Most church daycares also don't do the before and after, so you only have the 9-2 option, or you have to do to a daycare center, which is usually 6-6. It makes it MUCH cheaper to go this route. (which is a BIG factor when talking about twins!) We will definitely have to do the beforecare every day, but there will be many days where I can make it there by 2:30 with my job. Not every day, but some days. And they also have a part-time schedule as well, so we are hopefully going to get to do that in the summer. Oh, and the classrooms were great. They get a new class about every 3-6 months. They have three playgrounds too, and lots of activities. It's more like a "school" which we liked.

Now, the downside you ask?? Well, the wait list already has 53 kids on it. And that is a big bummer. But, we do have friends that attend this church, and they said they would help us. Plus, there are tons of families that want only full-time. And the director said that since we are hoping to get into the summer program as part-time, we have a really good chance of getting in, therefore making our chances really good in the fall, since we are already enrolled.

Secondly, we attended our first class! Used to be, on your typical Friday night, we were out at a bar, having some beers. Now, we are at Baptist hospital from 6:30-9:30 learning all the joys of having multiple babies. There were about 10-15 couples in the class. It was really very good for us to go. They had a mom of 6-year old twin girls speak to us for a while and we did a big Q&A section. We talked about birth, what to expect the first year, how to handle it, and how not to kill yourself. :) Also, just general stuff, like what she couldn't live without, what worked for her, etc.

To Jake's delight (notice the sarcasm) we also got to watch birthing videos! We watched twins being born vaginally, and via c-section. Wow, is all I can say. There is definitely a reason they put that big blue sheet up during a c-section. I really don't think you are supposed to see what happens down there.

We also toured the NICU at Baptist. This was by far the hardest. I guess most moms of singletons don't really have to worry about this. I mean, they do, but with twins its a very real possibility that my babies could end up here, as most twins do. Those poor babies. It was so hard to see. There were two in there that weighed exactly what mine do now. 1 lb, 6 oz. They were TINY. And there was another one that weighed 12 oz- 12 oz!!!! Its little legs were as big as my finger. It was so scary. It made me so determined to do whatever necessary to keep these babies in as long as I possibly can. Please pray that it happens!!

Random pictures

I found some random pictures while clearing out my digital camera, and definitely want to keep these forever.

This picture is of my mother. This was her retirement party on May 22nd. I gave her a "Happy Retirement" card. In the card, I stated that I was glad she was retiring, because she would need lots of free time to take care of her new grandchild. When she looked at me after reading it, that was when I got this perfect shot:

These next pictures were of my positive pregnancy tests (12DPO and 11DPO - days past ovulation). I tested like crazy. Yes, I know the lines are very, very faint. But, they were positive, I'm sure of it, LOL.

All is well in Sugarland

My results finally came back from my glucose screening, which is to test if I have signs of gestational diabetes. And....it's negative! Woohoo! I have been a little on the concerned side, as I have been loving on some sugar throughout this pregnancy. So, how did I celebrate?

Went promptly to Gigi's Cupcakes and got a Boston Cream cupcake, which is yellow cake with vanilla filling dipped in chocolate ganache. I very well may have gestational diabetes by my next appointment if I keep this up. But, luckily, I only get my Gigi's fix on very random occasions.

This seems about right

Hmmmm....what am I going to do about my kitties?? They seem to think they are babies, and this is their new home.

Zelly on the changing table

Gus in the crib

Gus trying to grab my camera from the crib. He thought this was a fun game to play.

How Nice

Yesterday at a school:

Her: "Well, my daughter looked just like you a week ago."

Me: "Oh really? Is she pregnant?"

Her: "Not anymore, she had her baby three days ago."

Me: "Oh, well, how nice. I am only a little more than halfway, but thanks!"

Fatty at the wedding

Well, I survived the wedding weekend. I didn't have to lift anything, which was super-duper. I did do all the boutonnieres and helped with the bouquets, and other things here and there. And the clean-up afterwards - yikes. The babies had a fab time.

I did not wear the "tent" dress. Whole separate story there. Went to my oh so fabulous seamstress to pick it up on Friday and she started crying and told me it wasn't done. THE DAY BEFORE THE WEDDING. I could have killed her. My friend Larissa's mom did the best she could, but it was just an ugly dress. Everyone thought instead I should wear my back-up from JC Penney's, which I did - and it was knit - even better :)

Here are some pics of Fatty at the Wedding: (its easier to do a slide show when there are so many pictures)

Happy Birthday to Me!

Well, today is the big day. No not the "delivery" big day, just the other much less-important one. I am officially 30ish this year. Happy Birthday to me! I am normally one of those "I LOVE MY BIRTHDAY!" people. On any given birthday, I may tell numerous strangers about my special day. But not this year. This year I finally have my birthday wish that I have been wishing for for long time. (Plus not to mention I am now in my thirties, so honestly, whats to celebrate there??)

But I am happy. And I do want to celebrate. I finally have my birthday wish. Thank you to my husband for giving me the best gift I could have ever imagined or asked for. The twins are the best, most wonderful present in the whole wide world. I cannot wait to meet them.

So sweet and precious....

YAY! I'm finally pregnant!

Well, LOL, of course I am pregnant, but I still am in denial about this whole thing. It is all just so unbelievable. So, two things happened this week in everyday life to make me believe this is actually happening. (I guess I am just not believing the u/s tech when she is actually "seeing babies in there, tehe)

Thing 1. I was in Ft. Campbell, KY working on Tuesday. For those who don't know, its a military base, so you have to stop and basically trade over your first born to gain entry. But, they have a few schools there that I need to go visit. So, as I am approaching the counter, I try to lean up close like I normally do and rest my arms on top. Well, something was blocking me from doing that and I assumed it was a shelf or something that I was bumping into. Turns out it was my belly!! My belly was actually big enough to prevent me from going all the way up to the counter. So cool!!!

Thing 2. Me and my friend went to see Julie and Julia (wonderful, wonderful movie, BTW). And for what I think may be the first time, I felt my little girl moving around. She is up on my left side right against my ribs. I can't really explains whan it feels like. It is kind of a fluttering sensation that feels like a big whoose of air goes through my stomach. It kind of makes me short of breath. Well, now that I'm typing it, I am hoping it was a baby and not a heart attack or something, jeez. One time during the movie, you could even feel her. Some part of her was jutting out of my stomach. So surreal, and so cool. Love this! I can't wait for them to start kicking. I am on the edge of my seat. Jake will be so excited.

Baby J's

We are trying to stick with J names for the baby boy and girl. Jake is the third generation of "J" first name and the same middle name, so we have to stick with a "J" for him. So, we are trying out J names for girls too. We are having a hard time agreeing on anything. We are very different in terms of what we like. Which, I definitely think all parents go through, right? So, for the meantime, we are going to think J's, and if it doesn't work, it doesn't work. But, we are going to try. Any ideas out there?

Diapers, Diapers, and more diapers

We went to dinner last night with a girl whose sister had twins a couple of years ago. We were informed that twins go through at least 20 diapers PER DAY. PER DAY!!!!!! My God, they're babies, good grief! I don't even go to the bathroom that many times per day.

Have I mentioned that neither Jake nor I have ever changed a diaper in our lives?? Hmmmm, I am just going to go with the opinion that my children won't poo. That will save at least 10, doncha think?

I.N.S.O.M.N.I.A

Why can't I sleep? Is this normal, or is this b/c I am the home to multiple babies? Three times I have gotten up in the middle of the night lately (2-3am) and watched TV for several hours, until I finally fall back asleep around 5am.

I seem to have "popped" in the last week (will post a belly soon, I promise). I think that may have something to do with it. I am constantly aware of my stomach while trying to sleep. I am so terrified I am going to do something to hurt them. Plus, reading about it certainly doesn't seem to help. Basically you can't do the following while pregnant:

lie on your back

lie on your stomach

lie on your right side

So that basically leave sleeping on my left side - doesn't give a while lot of options, huh? I read online that a full body pillow helps, so that you can put your head on the top, your stomach along the center, and put the bottom between your legs to help with leg and hip pain. Well, there is only so long you can lie like that before you are desperate to roll over. Especially when you are getting up in the middle of the night anyway to pee, and have to fall back asleep, which is so hard to do now that you have started cramping. *sigh*

At least school hasn't started yet. I am welcome to take naps as much as I want. I haven't today, and since it's 4:30, its likely I won't get to. But thats ok, because we are eating pizza tonight, and I would much rather trade pizza for sleep - who wouldn't?

Showing/Not Showing

I wish this body of mine would make up its mind. In the mornings when I wake up, there is a little bit of a baby bump. As the day progresses, the gassy bloat machine takes over and it looks like I am well into my second trimester. Catch me in the evening, and you might think I may head on over to Baptist Hospital. I jest, but it really is crazy. And sucking in during this time? Not even an option. It's like these babies are trying to create a big pillow of fat over them so to protect them. Do they not trust me on my own? Jeez....

11.5 weeks!

This is going by so fast!! I cannot believe I am already 11.5 weeks. I am so close to being out of the first trimester. I still don't feel pregnant. This is like some crazy, bizarre dream. A very lovely dream, mind you, but still a dream. It seems like yesterday we were talking about what we would try next month.

That being said, I guess because its still "not real" for me, I have not been into pregnancy books much. I am probably the only pregnant girl on the planet that didn't rush out to buy "What to Expect while you're Expecting". I did check out "When You're Expecting Twins, Triplets, or Quads" by Dr. Luke from the library and have picked it up maybe two or three times. And my recent check out was "Pregnancy for Dummies", LOL, because that seems way more up my alley. I think I have just been not too worried about anything. With all the mess we've been going through so far, I guess I haven't been too concerned with if I should or should not eat a turkey sandwich. (which technically you aren't supposed to do, because of the risk of the bacteria listeria on deli meat, which, by the way, you can also get not pregnant). I guess I need to get better about that. I have been pretty good about which fish I can eat, thanks to Google on my phone.

You can get really over-obsessed with what you should and shouldn't do during pregnancy. And usually I am a very obsessive person about things. But, I also love peanut butter. (Which, you also aren't supposed to eat frequently, because it can cause your children to have a peanut allergy). I just find that hard to believe and trust, because if anyone knows my mother, all three of us girls came out of the womb with sticky peanut butter fingers.